Guest Blogger Thursday ~ Heather from God Centered Mom

Boy, Oh Boy!



My husband has 3 sisters. His dad has 4 sisters. His grandfather had no siblings. The prosperity of the “MacFadyen” name was resting on our shoulders. We needed to have a boy.

#1

The day of the ultrasound arrived and low and behold there it was on the screen…”the 3rd leg”. We were shocked but in a happy way. We were amazed. We’d done it! On the first try! Amazing. I’m sure he would be cute and get married and have children and carry on this Scottish name with pride.

#2

Our next pregnancy began when my first child was 16 months old. We were excited to have kids close together. I was excited to maybe experience another gender. Something new.
But the moment she turned on the screen there it was again…”the 3rd leg”. I had just settled down in the seat when she made the announcement. I think my husband had just turned on the video camera. It came so quickly it took me by more surprise than ever. It was liked getting punched in the gut…out of no where. I think once she left the room I cried a little. I had convinced myself it would be a girl this time.
I remember lying in bed with my husband discussing what we needed to get for the 2nd baby and I mentioned a cute Pottery Barn bedding set that I wanted to get and monogram. He said, “Well couldn’t he just use the same set we already have?” I burst into tears. “This baby doesn’t have anything special. He gets hand-me-down clothes, car seat, toys, stroller. I just want something to make this experience feel different and special!!” Guess who got the PB crib bedding?

#3

We have always wanted 4 children but in my mind I wanted to have 2 close together then a 3-4 yr space and then 2 more close together. Life doesn’t always go according to “plan.” When my 2nd child was 14 months old I got pregnant with our 3rd child. I was not thrilled. We had just settled into a good routine. I was loving having 2 boys and they were just starting to really play together. Life was good.
I was starting over again. The nausea. The exhaustion. The anger. The emotions. The only thing that got me a little excited about this pregnancy was the hope that maybe this time we would have a girl. I mean, how perfect would that be? 2 boys and then 2 girls. Perfection.
For this ultrasound we decided (mistakenly) to bring the boys along. My eldest son was convinced I was having a girl. Told his teachers that I was having a girl and we were calling her “Lucy”.
So when that sonographer again saw…”the 3rd leg”, my sweet 3 yr old son verbalized what I wanted to. He yelled out “NO!!! It’s a girl!! No you’re wrong. It’s not a boy. We have boys. It’s a girl!!!” We left the doctor’s office and he broke my heart when I was loading him in the car and he started crying…so desperate for a little sister. He and I sat on the couch at home, held each other and shared tears of sadness.

#4

My wonderful gift, my 3rd child (who is gorgeous and sweet and awesome in soooo many ways) was almost 2 by the time we got pregnant. That’s the longest I’ve gone between pregnancy. I was having some medical issues and was actually about to start medication when I discovered I was pregnant…against all odds.
I am so excited to be pregnant this time. I have been telling everyone that I would be happy if this baby was a boy or a girl. Having a family of 4 boys sounds so fun. Having a girl for the first time would be wonderful as well. I truly thought that’s what I believed…until I purchased the Intelligender test and the results revealed…”BOY!”.
I just completely lost it. Sobbing uncontrollably on the bed. Listing off all the things I would “never” get to experience…ballet class, passing down my Barbies, tea parties, painting toe nails, braiding hair.
It has taken me two weeks since taking that test to come to the point of being okay with the results. I know that this baby is such a precious gift. I know that I am meant to be a mother to boys and that is a special blessing. I know that mother-daughter relationships are not always wonderful & can be really challenging. I know that I may still get 4 amazing daughter-in-laws and granddaughters.
Mostly, I am thankful for a test that helped reveal my true feelings before the ultrasound. There is still a small chance that I am having a girl…a fact to be revealed in 3 weeks. But I am thankful for the opportunity to enjoy this ultrasound, instead of crying big, fat, ugly tears of disappointment. I will be able to examine each of the amazing features of that baby and be in awe of the miracle of life.


Heather MacFadyen has been married for 12 years, is the mother of
3 young boys and, in her “free time”, writes for her blog,
www.godcenteredmom.com. Her goal is to encourage other moms (and
herself) to daily clothe themselves in humility by placing God in the
center, so they can serve their families with joy and to bring God
glory.